Animated Ailments

In my attempt to combat the annoying cough and cold that I can't seem to shake I've been forced to resort to over the counter medication. I turned to NyQuil because, well because it has alcohol in it and it has been known to render me unconscious and unaware of whether I'm coughing or not. This time around it hasn't worked quite as well as it has in the past and my wife suggested I try an OTC med that she had been using. Mucinex. It's a cough suppressant in pill form and while it seems to work pretty well it has one of the worst names in marketing history. It reminds me of Mueslix, the cereal.

Which in turn reminds me, for some strange reason, of Moose Lips.

Which aren't something I'd want to put in my mouth either for breakfast or to stop coughing.

In any case, what I really began to think about was advertising campaigns for drugs. I don't know about the rest of you but I don't send my 12 year old out to buy medicine for me. So could someone please tell me why the hell all of our physical ailments have to be portrayed by cartoons on the commercials? I don't want to think about a lungful of mucus having a dance party in my chest. It's bad enough it's making me cough without thinking about what it's doing with Mrs. Mucus down there.

Are we supposed to run out and buy Nasonex because the Bee has a sexy Antonio Banderas accent? Christ, if you're not paying attention you could end up thinking that Honey Nut Cheerios can cure allergy symptoms.

What the hell are these blobby things on the Zoloft commercial supposed to be anyway? So Zoloft turns you from a sad blob into a happy blob? Welcome to America.

Don't even get me started about Toenail Fungus!

And why do they use cartoons for some and not others? Why not cartoon critters for a cure for crabs, jock itch, or yeast infections? They would all seem to lend themselves to the use of animated creatures crawling around your body crevasses. Wait, I know I know, they could get Bob the Builder to be spokesman for Viagra or Levitra and have this little cartoon construction team with a crane working in the background. Whadaya think?