Tuesday, January 15, 2008

A Quiz and a Bonus Joke

Here's a short quiz that was reportedly given to "professionals" at Andersen Consulting Worldwide. The questions are not that difficult. I'll post the answers tomorrow.

1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?

2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?

3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend
except one. Which animal does not attend?


4. There is a river you must cross. But it is inhabited by crocodiles. How do
you manage it?



And since we're testing professional and problem solving skills here's a joke involving a creative sales pitch.

Boudreaux, the smoothest-talking Cajun in the Louisiana National Guard, got called up to active duty one day.

Boudreaux's first assignment was to a military induction center, and because he was a good talker they assigned him the duty of advising new recruits about government benefits, especially the GI insurance to which they were entitled.

Before long, the Captain in charge of the induction center began noticing that Boudreaux was getting a 99% sign-up rate for the more expensive supplemental form of GI insurance.

This was odd, because it would cost these low-income recruits $30.00 per month more for the higher coverage, compared to what the government was already providing at no charge.

The Captain decided that he would not ask Boudreaux directly about his selling techniques, but instead he would sit in the back of the room at the next briefing and observe Boudreaux's sales pitch.

Boudreaux stood up before the latest group of inductees and said, "If you has da normal GI insurans an' you goes to Iraq an' gets youself killed, da governmen' pays you beneficiary $20,000. If you takes out da supplemental insurans, which cost you only t'irty dollars a mons, den da the governmen' gots ta pay you beneficiary $200,000!"

"NOW," Boudreaux concluded, "which bunch you tink dey gonna send ta Iraq first."

13 comments:

Kitty said...

Are the giraffe and elephant alive? I bet I've already failed just for asking the question haven't I? :-p
x

Bruce, a work in progress said...

Of course they're alive! My god do you want to get PETA and Greenpeace on my back?

pissed off patricia said...

Good punch line on the joke.

My answer to questions 1,2 and 4 is you don't. As for number 3, I haven't a clue.

Bruce, a work in progress said...

Patricia, okay, but lets assume that you can. How? Thanks for the Martini. I've been needing one.

Mike said...

What I want to know is how do I get the freaking elephant out of the fridge after I get him in there.

Forrest Proper said...

I actually know the answers, but I won't spoil it for others. Just remember- brutal common sense (sort of the opposite of Bushy-think).

Malicious Intent said...

Oh this is so freak'n easy....

How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator? You use magic pixie dust to shrink the giraffe.

2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator? Same thing, but it may take a double dusting of pixie dust.

3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend except one. Which animal does not attend? Actually there are two, the elephant and the giraffe...they are stuck in the fridge.

4. There is a river you must cross. But it is inhabited by crocodiles. How do you manage it? You throw Dick Cheney into the river to distract the crocodiles and then hop across.

Ain't ya'll glad I don't drink?? :)

Bruce, a work in progress said...

Mike, all I know is that with an elephant in there I doubt there'd be nearly enough room for my beer.

Ah Col. You are wise in the ways of exotic animal refridgeration.

MI, hmm. Interesting responses. I guess we'll have to wait until tomorrow to see how you did. I'll go have a drink for you.

Malach the Merciless said...

Colonel beat me, I have already heard this one, so I will leave it to others

Malach the Merciless said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Hungry Mother said...

I guess in 1 and 2 you build one the right size. The lion won't attend because he's the host. I guess you build a bridge in 4.

Didn't Anderson's brilliant workers sort of foul up in recent years?

Tequila Mockingbird said...

i wish i still smoked pot, because those are the kind of questions i would like to ponder during a bong-infused evening.

obviously, if you are having a lion king animal conference, you keep out simba, because he's just going to fuck up and let mufasa die.

Bruce, a work in progress said...

HM, you're doing a lot of building. Are you an engineer?

TM, yeah, they definitely are those kind of questions. Cut Simba some slack, he was a kid. He grew up and redeemed himself.